Dir en grey - The Pledge [UNPLUGGED]
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
Monday, May 20, 2013
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Saturday, May 18, 2013
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Monday, May 6, 2013
Saturday, May 4, 2013
Friday, May 3, 2013
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Monday, April 22, 2013
Portrait WIPs
A couple of updates ago I mentioned that I would like to upload some of my art here on my blog. So now I've finally decided that I'm gonna get to it. Here are two portrait previews of two of my favourite original characters, Nick Schmidt to the left and Danny Ashby to the right. I love them, they're my little baby boys. I'll hopefully get these done soon, so I'll upload the finished pictures for you guys to see!
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Did I mention that I have the best of friends?
It's ridiculous how Red, one of my best friends, can make me cry and
smile with the snap of a finger. But how can I not when she makes
beautiful art, including my characters in it? I mean, just fucking look
at the picture below!
IT'S SO PRETTY AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO BECAUSE OW FEELS.
To see more of Red's stuff, go to her tumblr!
Do it or I will fucking punch you in the dick or vaginal area.
http://kinkypokemonart.tumblr.com/
IT'S SO PRETTY AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO BECAUSE OW FEELS.
To see more of Red's stuff, go to her tumblr!
Do it or I will fucking punch you in the dick or vaginal area.
http://kinkypokemonart.tumblr.com/
F E E L S
As I mentioned in my previous post, I took Elliot with me to go and see my Dad at his place last Friday. We met up on the way there and sat ourselves on the bus, talking about our childhood memories from the place, because it appears that we both used to hang around there when we were little. We actually found out that we used to play on the same playground, which is super freaky because what if me and Elliot used to play together as kids? And now, many years after, we're together! F R E A K Y I tell ya.
When we got off the buss we began to walk slowly towards my Dad's apartment. Apparently, Elliot's Grandmother used to live in the same building as him (seriously, I'm getting goosebumps!), so he got all nostalgic when we walked by the playground there. It was kinda cute how he got all excited about it all. Sorry but not sorry, Elliot.
We eventually arrived outside my Dad's door and rang the bell. He, too, seemed to be excited about me and Elliot coming over and I just couldn't stop smiling when they said hello to each other. We got our coats off and Dad urged us to sit down and join him by the table. It was so nice how he offered us chips and tea and I was so happy about how well he and Elliot got along. Even though they both ganged up on me and teased me a whole lot. Ugh.
We talked about this and that and I didn't want time to pass, didn't want to see Elliot leave. But, all fun must come to an end, right? I offered to drop Elliot off by the bus and he and my Dad said their goodbyes (they even hugged, eeeeeeh~). Funny thing is, me and Elliot didn't head to the bus immediately. We stood outside and talked about the evening, about Elliot's book and a bunch of other stuff as we took a smoke. But we did walk to the bus station soon enough. Though, like many times before, none of us didn't want to see the other go, so we ended up hanging there for maybe two hours, listening to music and talking and smoking.
Time went by and it got late, so Elliot took the bus and headed home to his Mother that lives not too far away from there. I went back to my Dad's and crawled into bed. I was so tired. But before I could drift off to sleep, Elliot sent me a bunch of adorable text messages, and I think I shed a tear or two because oh my God my heart.
The day came to an end and I fell asleep. So, there, that was pretty much the highlight of my weekend. It was so fun to see my Dad and boyfriend getting along and my Dad actually said that he'd love to see us come by soon again! That is definitely something I can't say no to.
When we got off the buss we began to walk slowly towards my Dad's apartment. Apparently, Elliot's Grandmother used to live in the same building as him (seriously, I'm getting goosebumps!), so he got all nostalgic when we walked by the playground there. It was kinda cute how he got all excited about it all. Sorry but not sorry, Elliot.
We eventually arrived outside my Dad's door and rang the bell. He, too, seemed to be excited about me and Elliot coming over and I just couldn't stop smiling when they said hello to each other. We got our coats off and Dad urged us to sit down and join him by the table. It was so nice how he offered us chips and tea and I was so happy about how well he and Elliot got along. Even though they both ganged up on me and teased me a whole lot. Ugh.
We talked about this and that and I didn't want time to pass, didn't want to see Elliot leave. But, all fun must come to an end, right? I offered to drop Elliot off by the bus and he and my Dad said their goodbyes (they even hugged, eeeeeeh~). Funny thing is, me and Elliot didn't head to the bus immediately. We stood outside and talked about the evening, about Elliot's book and a bunch of other stuff as we took a smoke. But we did walk to the bus station soon enough. Though, like many times before, none of us didn't want to see the other go, so we ended up hanging there for maybe two hours, listening to music and talking and smoking.
Time went by and it got late, so Elliot took the bus and headed home to his Mother that lives not too far away from there. I went back to my Dad's and crawled into bed. I was so tired. But before I could drift off to sleep, Elliot sent me a bunch of adorable text messages, and I think I shed a tear or two because oh my God my heart.
The day came to an end and I fell asleep. So, there, that was pretty much the highlight of my weekend. It was so fun to see my Dad and boyfriend getting along and my Dad actually said that he'd love to see us come by soon again! That is definitely something I can't say no to.
Monday, April 15, 2013
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Friday, April 12, 2013
SO EXCITE
In a matter of minutes I'm going to go take a shower and get myself ready, because as soon as my Mom comes back home from work I'm getting my butt over to my Dad's place. On my way there, I'm going to meet up with Elliot who's coming with me there to meet my Dad for the first time ever. Apparently, he's a bit nervous about it all (which I find super cute omg). But I think it'll go really well. My Dad's a nice guy and I think he's looking forward to meet my boyfriend, to get to know him and so on.
I can hardly wait, I'm so excited for them to meet, aaah!
I can hardly wait, I'm so excited for them to meet, aaah!
ASK ME STUFF
If you ever feel like asking me something or wanting to write something random to me, just to pass time or whatever, then you can do so on my ask.fm! It's really simple and you can ask things anonymously if that feels more comfortable. I am le bored, so ask away!
http://ask.fm/omnomcurlyfries
http://ask.fm/omnomcurlyfries
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Feeling blue...
I woke up feeling sad this morning. Sad and lonely. I don't know why, though. Maybe because of the panic attack I had during the night? I stayed in bed, silently looking into the TV, watching whatever was on. I always sleep with my TV on when I'm alone. It's mostly because of my phobia for turned off televisons, but lately I've been wondering if I find some sort of comfort from it. Maybe I feel more safe when I hear people talking as I drift off to sleep? I kept staring blankly into it, until I heard the pling of a new text message from my phone.
"Look outside your window," it said. Puff had sent it. I threw on my gray sweat pants and my hoodie and opened the window. And there she stood, with her friend Avan, smiling towards me. I was surprised, to say the least. But I instantly felt happy by the sight. Puff asked me if I wanted to take a smoke, and even though I just woke up and felt like I looked like shit, I just couldn't say no. Didn't want to say no. So I ran down the stairs and joined them on my porch, smoking and talking. It was like some higher power knew how I was feeling, that they knew how badly I needed someone there with me.
We made coffee and drank it outside my house, smoked and talked some more, listened to music. It felt great. But I still had these desperate thoughts that I didn't want to see them go. They had to, eventually. And I watched them head back to the school, only a five minute walk away from my house. I texted Puff, asking her if she could come back later, after school. She returned my message, telling me that she could.
So, now I'm sitting here, waiting for her to come back here and join me on the stone steps outside my door.
Taking a smoke. Talking. Listening to music.
"Look outside your window," it said. Puff had sent it. I threw on my gray sweat pants and my hoodie and opened the window. And there she stood, with her friend Avan, smiling towards me. I was surprised, to say the least. But I instantly felt happy by the sight. Puff asked me if I wanted to take a smoke, and even though I just woke up and felt like I looked like shit, I just couldn't say no. Didn't want to say no. So I ran down the stairs and joined them on my porch, smoking and talking. It was like some higher power knew how I was feeling, that they knew how badly I needed someone there with me.
We made coffee and drank it outside my house, smoked and talked some more, listened to music. It felt great. But I still had these desperate thoughts that I didn't want to see them go. They had to, eventually. And I watched them head back to the school, only a five minute walk away from my house. I texted Puff, asking her if she could come back later, after school. She returned my message, telling me that she could.
So, now I'm sitting here, waiting for her to come back here and join me on the stone steps outside my door.
Taking a smoke. Talking. Listening to music.
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
: (
Here's a video from last week when Elliot and Puff came over to hang out with me at my place! It's stupid, but I find it hilarious and can't really stop laughing at it, so I thought I'd share.
I haven't mentioned on my blog yet that I am a huge Teen Wolf fan, but I will most likely go into the subject more in the near future. In the video, I am actually cosplaying as one of the main characters, Stiles Stilinski, who also is one of my absolute faves on the show. The cosplay wasn't that serious in the video, actually. But still! I hope you'll enjoy!
Monday, April 8, 2013
Sunday, April 7, 2013
Oh, joyous feeling
On Friday, Puff came over to my place to hang out with me and Elliot, who would arrive a litte later than her. It was super nice. We talked about various things, both good and bad, and just enjoyed each others company.
Puff had to leave soon enough and her Dad came and picked her up with his car. So, it was just me and Elliot. We didn't really do much, we just watched a bunch of videos on youtube, being lazy as I rubbed his feet (which he apparently liked a lot if the sounds he made was anything to go by). Time went by and it got late, so we put our jackets on to walk to the train station where I would drop him off. Though, neither of us wanted to say goodbye, so it ended up with us hanging out there in the cold for a couple of hours, talking about nothing and everything as we smoked probably too many cigarettes for one evening.
But, Elliot was forced to leave eventually, and so he went to the platform where the train would arrive. I could see him from the small bridge I had to walk over to go back home, so I stopped and stayed there until the train would come, howling to Elliot without a care if people looked at me like I was crazy.
Right then, everything felt so good, so completely right and I had this incredible joyous feeling that consumed my whole being and it stuck to me like glue for the rest of the evening.
Puff had to leave soon enough and her Dad came and picked her up with his car. So, it was just me and Elliot. We didn't really do much, we just watched a bunch of videos on youtube, being lazy as I rubbed his feet (which he apparently liked a lot if the sounds he made was anything to go by). Time went by and it got late, so we put our jackets on to walk to the train station where I would drop him off. Though, neither of us wanted to say goodbye, so it ended up with us hanging out there in the cold for a couple of hours, talking about nothing and everything as we smoked probably too many cigarettes for one evening.
But, Elliot was forced to leave eventually, and so he went to the platform where the train would arrive. I could see him from the small bridge I had to walk over to go back home, so I stopped and stayed there until the train would come, howling to Elliot without a care if people looked at me like I was crazy.
Right then, everything felt so good, so completely right and I had this incredible joyous feeling that consumed my whole being and it stuck to me like glue for the rest of the evening.
Sorry for the wall of text!
On Wednesday I got my ass outta my house to meet up with Elliot and go with him to the meeting he had an appointment to. He kind of needed someone to take his hand and drag him there, so of course I didn't hesitate to act as moral support. Also, spending some time with him is definitely a big plus and the weather was so nice outside so I couldn't see a reason to why I shouldn't go with him.
We got to the location about an hour earlier, just to hang out and whatnot. Elliot treated me to burgers, which was so very nice of him because I hadn't eaten anything that day. We sat on a bench and enjoyed the sun, eating our burgers and smoking cigarette after cigarette. I think I even said something like "I wish we could stay like this forever," because at that moment I honestly wanted time to stop ticking away.
When the time came, we went to the meeting and I waited for Elliot in the lobby area, playing Tekken: Dark Resurection on my PSP. Tekken is by far the best fighting game I've ever played to date and I love the characters and their designs and the many stories the game provides. My absolute favourite character to play as is Hwoarang. He's pretty fucking awesome and he kicks ass, literally. He uses this kicking kind of style when he fights and oh my God, the combos he can do, unf. My second top favourite character is Sergei Dragunov. I mean, just his name is sexy enough to leave me drooling. I can't stop fanboying over him, he's so disturbingly hot it makes me want to roll around on the ground and groan in pain about how unfair it is that an animated character looks the way he does.
Elliot eventually came back and we left the building, in need of taking a smoke again. We wandered around for a bit, looking into the many kinds of clothing stores there, until Elliot decided it was time to buy burgers again and then take the train to my place. When we got there, my little sister looked at me and asked me if I had cut my hair. I was wearing a cap at that moment, so I took it off and showed my new haircut to her. She looked thoughtful for a moment, until she suddenly said "You look like Tony Stark," and I almost wanted to cry right then and there and I hugged her so hard. My little sister thinks I look like Tony Stark! I can't get over that, aaah!
My bby stayed over for the night. Sleeping right next to him, with my arm wrapped over his torso and my head resting by his shoulder is one of the comfiest things ever. I feel safe when I sleep next to him, and waking up by his side makes the next day always seem so much more brighter.
Like every other day, he and I took a smoke or five out on my porch with a cup of coffee in hand, listening to music. We were both in a big Lady Gaga mood that day. When I hear 'Bloody Mary' or 'Telephone' I honestly want to get up and just dance my butt off, even though I can't dance for shits.
I also remembered that Dir en grey's new mini album had released the day before and I immediately downloaded it. Oh sweet baby Jesus, I cried so bad when I listened to it, and I squeezed Elliot's hand so hard it must've hurt.
Elliot had another appointment that he needed to attend to that day, so I followed him to the bus and kissed and waved him goodbye. And when I returned home, me and my Mother decided that it was about time to visit the care centre and get some shit done, seeing as people seem to be completely handicapped and can't do their job as they should.
Let me explain; I urgently contacted the care centre a few weeks ago for my mental health. It's been spiraling downwards for quite some time now and I seriously need help. The doctor that took me in wanted to write out a prescription for me, a set of sleeping pills and anti-depressants that I had been taking a couple of years ago when I still went to the psychiatry clinic for teens. But, seeing as I couldn't go there anymore at the age of 18 I stopped taking the anti-depressants, also because I was feeling better and wanted to try and see if I could manage without them. Still, just because a doctor wants to give me a couple of pills without even knowing what's wrong with me, I won't agree to it. What I want is a psychologist who can help me with my problems, not give me pills the first chance they get, just to get it over with. Only taking pills won't do me any good. Also, I am scared shitless to take anti-depressent or whatever pills I might get, and that's because I about a year ago came to the point where I felt like it wasn't worth it anymore and I just gave up on everything right then and tried to overdose with a bunch of anti-depressants that I had laying around collecting dust. Nothing major happened, I don't even remember half of what happened to be honest. I just woke up the next morning, feeling really tired. But the fact that I even tried to overdose, to end my life, scares me so incredibly much. What if I ever try it again? What if I, at a moment where I just feel so tired of it all, try to overdose again? And what if I actually succeed then? These thoughts petrifies me. My Mother knows about this, and she's been supportive and have said that if it comes to the point where I need to go on a medication, she will take care of the pills for me, so that I won't get my hands on them, just in case.
Anyway, because the doctor couldn't do much for me, she told me that I could contact a psychiatric reception not that far from where I live and ask them for help, or that I could talk to the welfare officer that works there at the care centre. I told her that sure, I can talk to the welfare officer, but that I would need to come in contact with her as quickly as possible. She agreed and told me that she would talk to the welfare officer as soon as she could and that she would give her my number so that she could contact me when she had time for an appointment. She never called.
I didn't feel like just sitting there, rolling my thumbs, so I called the psychiatric reception and explained my situation and they said that they would like to bring me in, taking my problems seriously, but for them to be able to do that they needed the care centre to send them a letter of referral. The frustration I felt then, oh my God. Couldn't the doctor at the care centre have done it straight away? So I contacted the care centre and they told me that I needed to talk to the doctor that I visited and that I would have to speak with her when she had the time. I had to wait a couple of days until I was able to contact her, and when I eventually did get a hold of her I explained to her that I would need for her to send that referral for me. She, for some stupid reason, didn't want to do that but wanted me to speak to the welfare officer that she had recommended when I first visited there. I told her that I hadn't gotten a call from the welfare officer and that I couldn't just sit and wait for her to contact me, and that I seriously didn't think that she would be able to do much for me and that I would need help from a psychologist instead. She insisted, saying that the welfare officer had called me and even left me a message (even though I straight up told her that I had no missed calls and no voice- or text messages left for me) and that she would contact her again to tell her to give me a call. I was so angry by then that I gave up and just gave her the ok to contact the welfare officer once more and that I would wait for her call. Once again, she never called.
I told my Mother all about this, and so she decided that enough was enough and that she would help me through this. So, she came with me to the care centre and we got an appointment with a doctor that we told the whole story to. She, thankt the Heavens, took the situation seriously and thought that of course someone should send away that referral for me, agreeing that I was in need of serious help. She pulled some strings for us and got an appointment with another doctor for us that asked me a couple of questions. He was surprised to see that I was smiling when I told him what my problem was, which I replied to "It's a defence mechanism," which it definitely is. He also asked me if I had tried to take my life, which I answered yes, I have. His reaction was "Oh," and he wrote somethig on a letter. Both me and my Mother found his reactions a little funny.
The doctor eventually sent the referral for me and me and my Mother could leave the care centre. I was feeling so incredibly joyous at that time that I just wanted to throw my arms up into the air and scream. Things are finally happening! I'm going to get the help that I need and I am going to get better, even though I have a bumpy road ahead of me I couldn't care less. I'm going to get through this, one way or another.
Oh my God, I appologize for this wall of text and I thank the people who actually took their time to read all of it, you're awesome!
Here are two pictures that I took the day when I followed Elliot to his meeting. Puff, our mutual friend and one of my absolute best friends, told me that me and Elliot kind of look like Dean and Cas from Supernatural in the picture of us two together. Next cosplay, maybe?
We got to the location about an hour earlier, just to hang out and whatnot. Elliot treated me to burgers, which was so very nice of him because I hadn't eaten anything that day. We sat on a bench and enjoyed the sun, eating our burgers and smoking cigarette after cigarette. I think I even said something like "I wish we could stay like this forever," because at that moment I honestly wanted time to stop ticking away.
When the time came, we went to the meeting and I waited for Elliot in the lobby area, playing Tekken: Dark Resurection on my PSP. Tekken is by far the best fighting game I've ever played to date and I love the characters and their designs and the many stories the game provides. My absolute favourite character to play as is Hwoarang. He's pretty fucking awesome and he kicks ass, literally. He uses this kicking kind of style when he fights and oh my God, the combos he can do, unf. My second top favourite character is Sergei Dragunov. I mean, just his name is sexy enough to leave me drooling. I can't stop fanboying over him, he's so disturbingly hot it makes me want to roll around on the ground and groan in pain about how unfair it is that an animated character looks the way he does.
Elliot eventually came back and we left the building, in need of taking a smoke again. We wandered around for a bit, looking into the many kinds of clothing stores there, until Elliot decided it was time to buy burgers again and then take the train to my place. When we got there, my little sister looked at me and asked me if I had cut my hair. I was wearing a cap at that moment, so I took it off and showed my new haircut to her. She looked thoughtful for a moment, until she suddenly said "You look like Tony Stark," and I almost wanted to cry right then and there and I hugged her so hard. My little sister thinks I look like Tony Stark! I can't get over that, aaah!
My bby stayed over for the night. Sleeping right next to him, with my arm wrapped over his torso and my head resting by his shoulder is one of the comfiest things ever. I feel safe when I sleep next to him, and waking up by his side makes the next day always seem so much more brighter.
Like every other day, he and I took a smoke or five out on my porch with a cup of coffee in hand, listening to music. We were both in a big Lady Gaga mood that day. When I hear 'Bloody Mary' or 'Telephone' I honestly want to get up and just dance my butt off, even though I can't dance for shits.
I also remembered that Dir en grey's new mini album had released the day before and I immediately downloaded it. Oh sweet baby Jesus, I cried so bad when I listened to it, and I squeezed Elliot's hand so hard it must've hurt.
Elliot had another appointment that he needed to attend to that day, so I followed him to the bus and kissed and waved him goodbye. And when I returned home, me and my Mother decided that it was about time to visit the care centre and get some shit done, seeing as people seem to be completely handicapped and can't do their job as they should.
Let me explain; I urgently contacted the care centre a few weeks ago for my mental health. It's been spiraling downwards for quite some time now and I seriously need help. The doctor that took me in wanted to write out a prescription for me, a set of sleeping pills and anti-depressants that I had been taking a couple of years ago when I still went to the psychiatry clinic for teens. But, seeing as I couldn't go there anymore at the age of 18 I stopped taking the anti-depressants, also because I was feeling better and wanted to try and see if I could manage without them. Still, just because a doctor wants to give me a couple of pills without even knowing what's wrong with me, I won't agree to it. What I want is a psychologist who can help me with my problems, not give me pills the first chance they get, just to get it over with. Only taking pills won't do me any good. Also, I am scared shitless to take anti-depressent or whatever pills I might get, and that's because I about a year ago came to the point where I felt like it wasn't worth it anymore and I just gave up on everything right then and tried to overdose with a bunch of anti-depressants that I had laying around collecting dust. Nothing major happened, I don't even remember half of what happened to be honest. I just woke up the next morning, feeling really tired. But the fact that I even tried to overdose, to end my life, scares me so incredibly much. What if I ever try it again? What if I, at a moment where I just feel so tired of it all, try to overdose again? And what if I actually succeed then? These thoughts petrifies me. My Mother knows about this, and she's been supportive and have said that if it comes to the point where I need to go on a medication, she will take care of the pills for me, so that I won't get my hands on them, just in case.
Anyway, because the doctor couldn't do much for me, she told me that I could contact a psychiatric reception not that far from where I live and ask them for help, or that I could talk to the welfare officer that works there at the care centre. I told her that sure, I can talk to the welfare officer, but that I would need to come in contact with her as quickly as possible. She agreed and told me that she would talk to the welfare officer as soon as she could and that she would give her my number so that she could contact me when she had time for an appointment. She never called.
I didn't feel like just sitting there, rolling my thumbs, so I called the psychiatric reception and explained my situation and they said that they would like to bring me in, taking my problems seriously, but for them to be able to do that they needed the care centre to send them a letter of referral. The frustration I felt then, oh my God. Couldn't the doctor at the care centre have done it straight away? So I contacted the care centre and they told me that I needed to talk to the doctor that I visited and that I would have to speak with her when she had the time. I had to wait a couple of days until I was able to contact her, and when I eventually did get a hold of her I explained to her that I would need for her to send that referral for me. She, for some stupid reason, didn't want to do that but wanted me to speak to the welfare officer that she had recommended when I first visited there. I told her that I hadn't gotten a call from the welfare officer and that I couldn't just sit and wait for her to contact me, and that I seriously didn't think that she would be able to do much for me and that I would need help from a psychologist instead. She insisted, saying that the welfare officer had called me and even left me a message (even though I straight up told her that I had no missed calls and no voice- or text messages left for me) and that she would contact her again to tell her to give me a call. I was so angry by then that I gave up and just gave her the ok to contact the welfare officer once more and that I would wait for her call. Once again, she never called.
I told my Mother all about this, and so she decided that enough was enough and that she would help me through this. So, she came with me to the care centre and we got an appointment with a doctor that we told the whole story to. She, thankt the Heavens, took the situation seriously and thought that of course someone should send away that referral for me, agreeing that I was in need of serious help. She pulled some strings for us and got an appointment with another doctor for us that asked me a couple of questions. He was surprised to see that I was smiling when I told him what my problem was, which I replied to "It's a defence mechanism," which it definitely is. He also asked me if I had tried to take my life, which I answered yes, I have. His reaction was "Oh," and he wrote somethig on a letter. Both me and my Mother found his reactions a little funny.
The doctor eventually sent the referral for me and me and my Mother could leave the care centre. I was feeling so incredibly joyous at that time that I just wanted to throw my arms up into the air and scream. Things are finally happening! I'm going to get the help that I need and I am going to get better, even though I have a bumpy road ahead of me I couldn't care less. I'm going to get through this, one way or another.
Oh my God, I appologize for this wall of text and I thank the people who actually took their time to read all of it, you're awesome!
Here are two pictures that I took the day when I followed Elliot to his meeting. Puff, our mutual friend and one of my absolute best friends, told me that me and Elliot kind of look like Dean and Cas from Supernatural in the picture of us two together. Next cosplay, maybe?
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Oops, I did it again
This Tuesday I accidentally slipped and cut my hair again. Whoops! But I'm now one step closer to the actual haircut I want to have, I just need to take baby-steps to get there. And sweet baby Jesus, I am so glad to have gotten rid of the bangs I had before. It kept falling into my eyes and it had a tendency to fly around all over the place whenever a puff of air blew by.
I love the fact that now I only need to drag my fingers through my hair and just like that I've got this awesome style going on, aw yiss. Also, I look even more like a boy now and I just gfngfjnfhdkn, I cannot contain my excitement!
I love the fact that now I only need to drag my fingers through my hair and just like that I've got this awesome style going on, aw yiss. Also, I look even more like a boy now and I just gfngfjnfhdkn, I cannot contain my excitement!
Friday, April 5, 2013
Thursday, April 4, 2013
I'm still alive!
Sorry for my absence, but now I'm back on track to write about my weekend and the past couple of days!
A
friend of mine, Emil, came to Stockholm last Friday to stay at my place
for the weekend. I couldn't meet him up by the train station, so one of
my best friends, who we call Puff, picked him up for me and took him
with her to where I live. We hung out for a while until Puff needed to
head back home, so me and Emil went to the grocery store to buy this and
that. He, the nice motherfucker that he is, bought me two different
kinds of flavoured B&J ice cream, two energy drinks and a new pack
of Black Devils cigarettes for me. And when I told him that he shouldn't
have, he just brushed it off and told me that he's got plenty of cash
to spend. He's such a stupid show-off, ugh.
We went to
my place when we were done, ate dinner and watched Yu-Gi-Oh! The
Abridged Series. Oh my God, it's so hilarious! Check it out on youtube
if you haven't seen it, you won't regret it! Both me and Emil were
laughing hysterically and we've been quoting the show pretty much the
entire time he's been here.
The next day, we met up
with Puff to head to Stockholm City, where we would meet up with
Christina, Elliot and his brother Victor to later head to Gamla Stan to
go to a café and socialize for a while. It was so nice to see that
everyone got along so well. After spending some time there, we went to
Science Fiction Bokhandeln where we also met up with Lou to head inside
and do some shopping. I got Elliot a keyring of Gandalf from The Hobbit
as an Easter present and Emil bought me a poster from the same movie.
Agh, I can't wait to put it up on my wall! I actually have four awesome
posters that I need to get frames for before I can nail them up. My room
is going to look super fab once they're up there, unf.
We
wandered around in Gamla Stan for a while before we had to get to
Medborgarplatsen to pick up our movie tickets for Oz: The Great and The
Powerful. Christina had to leave, unfortunately, so we split up with her
to get the tickets and later go to Burger King to get some food in our
bellies before the movie. Puff ordered food for me. I seriously feel
like a spoiled boy. But truth be told, I just have awesome friends.
When we were done stuffing our faces with junk food it was finally movie time! So, we went back to the cinema and just as we were about to enter the cinema auditorium I completely freaked out because hanging on the wall was a humongous poster for the upcoming Iron Man 3 movie! Oh my God, it was so beautiful! Who do I have to sleep with to get it, seriously? And, of course, they had to show the trailer during the comercials too, gfhbdskb. I gotta apologize to Elliot, I was squeezing his hand so hard you guys don't even know.
Oz: The Great and The Powerful was definitely a great movie, in my opinion. The scenery was beautiful and it made me laugh and shed a tear or two. Totally a must-see!
Me and the group hung out for a bit after the movie until we all had to split up and head back to our homes. Me and Emil, of course, watched some more Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series before I had to go to sleep, seeing as I was dead tired by then.
Sunday came, meaning; Emil's last day in Stockholm. We went back to the city and re-visited Science Fiction Bokhandeln where he bought some movies for himself and the first season of Supernatural for me. I cannot handle how much that guy spoils me, it's ridiculous! He also treated me to ice cream, as a 'celebration' kind of thing for the weekend. It was nice just sitting down next to each other, enjoying the weather and the oh so delicious ice cream until we had to leave to catch his train. We eventually said our good byes and even though it was sad to part, I was still smiling from ear to ear.
Needless to say, the weekend was A W E S O M E.
Me and Elliot at the movies~
When we were done stuffing our faces with junk food it was finally movie time! So, we went back to the cinema and just as we were about to enter the cinema auditorium I completely freaked out because hanging on the wall was a humongous poster for the upcoming Iron Man 3 movie! Oh my God, it was so beautiful! Who do I have to sleep with to get it, seriously? And, of course, they had to show the trailer during the comercials too, gfhbdskb. I gotta apologize to Elliot, I was squeezing his hand so hard you guys don't even know.
Oz: The Great and The Powerful was definitely a great movie, in my opinion. The scenery was beautiful and it made me laugh and shed a tear or two. Totally a must-see!
Me and the group hung out for a bit after the movie until we all had to split up and head back to our homes. Me and Emil, of course, watched some more Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series before I had to go to sleep, seeing as I was dead tired by then.
Sunday came, meaning; Emil's last day in Stockholm. We went back to the city and re-visited Science Fiction Bokhandeln where he bought some movies for himself and the first season of Supernatural for me. I cannot handle how much that guy spoils me, it's ridiculous! He also treated me to ice cream, as a 'celebration' kind of thing for the weekend. It was nice just sitting down next to each other, enjoying the weather and the oh so delicious ice cream until we had to leave to catch his train. We eventually said our good byes and even though it was sad to part, I was still smiling from ear to ear.
Needless to say, the weekend was A W E S O M E.
Me and Elliot at the movies~
Friday, March 29, 2013
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Legend of Korra
Yesterday, my friend Simon came over to hang out with me for a couple of hours. It was super nice! We talked, smoked and I made dinner for the both of us that we engulfed as we watched the first episode of Legend of Korra. There's no secret that I'm a dork at heart, so I couldn't really contain my excitement when I finally got to re-watch the first episode of that amazingly awesome show. I was practically bouncing up and down in my chair, making stupid sounds of pure joy. Honestly though, Legend of Korra is so beautifully made. The animation is simply gorgeous and it's well-balanced with action, drama and humour. And personally, I think it's a great sequel of Avatar: The Last Airbender and if anyone think differently you're lying, go sit in a corner and think about your life choices. So, if you're ever feeling bored and want to get time going and feel like watching a great show, I suggest you go ahead and watch this one!
Here's a little teaser for you, the opening sequence of Legend of Korra!
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Good morning Starshine, the Earth says 'hello'!
In my opinion, mornings are best spent by sitting on my porch with a big cup of coffee in hand, a cigarette between my fingers and Queen's song 'I Want to Break Free' playing in the background.
Those are the type of mornings that I want to wake up to, every single day.
Those are the type of mornings that I want to wake up to, every single day.
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Here's an update, you little shits
Wow,
the past couple of days have been hectic like I don't even know. As I
mentioned in a previous post; me and Elliot went to our friend's place to
celebrate her Birthday and to party hard like it was our last day in
the living. It was awesome, even though some not-so-good things
happened. We had some really tasty white wine with us, it's called 'Tre
Apor' here in Sweden but translates to 'Three Monkeys'. It's so good,
ugh. So, anyway, Elliot managed to get me drunk. Yay, I guess, seeing as
I've never been drunk before. I'm 20 years old and I had never been
drunk before this Saturday, so now I can check that off the list of
'Things to Experience Before I Die'. I also got to take a puff of some
pot someone had brought, and I can tell you guys that I was so
incredibly happy after that it was ridiculous. The euphoria was over
9000! But, yeah, it was pretty stupid of me to mix pot and alcohol, so
naturally I eventually got dizzy and nauseous and threw up. No worries,
though. I handled the situation well, even Elliot was surprised with how
calm I was about the whole thing. What can I say? I'm Batman, I can
handle everything.
Me and Elliot finally went home after a good
couple of hours of pure awesomeness and crashed in bed after the long
way back to my house. We slept away most of the next day and when we
managed to get up we had such a craving for pizza, holy shit. So, of
course, we went to get some. I almost had a food orgasm because it was
so good. We watched The Exorcism of Emily Rose - which is one of my
absolute favourite movies, just fyi - in the meantime as we ate and we
also managed to stuff our faces with ice cream afterwards. I feel pretty
bad for Elliot though, he was so hung over whilst I felt perfectly
fine. I guess I'm lucky to be my Mother's child, she never gets hung
over. Huheuheuheuh.
Elliot stayed over one more night and the
bigger part of Monday we just chilled and cuddled. But we decided that
we needed to get out of the house for a bit and went to buy cigarettes -
which he payed for, the butthead - and to look for a place to eat.
Obviously, we ordered pizza, but we also asked for a large plate of
french fries on the side. It sounded like a good idea at the time. And
in the middle of eating, Elliot suddenly said "It's like we're
celebrating.", I didn't get it at first, but then I catched on and burst
out into laughter because we accidentally celebrated our first week of
being together, without realizing it! It was so hilarious, I'm actually
smiling as I'm writing this.
As we were eating, we suddenly heard
a knock on the window and outside stood Emelie and Simon, smiling and
waving at us, the dorks. We urged them to come inside, so they joined us
at our table and ate the food that we were too full to eat. We left the
restaurant after talking for a while, and after Elliot had payed - yes,
he payed for that too, ugh - we accompanied Emelie to the bus to later
follow Simon to the local grocery store where he bought some unhealthy
things because why the fuck not. After, we went out to take a smoke and
hang out for a while before Elliot and Simon would have to go. So we sat on a
bench and talked about everything and nothing. Or, well, they did, I was pretty
silent. Shit went down in my head and I got a panic attack.
Woopi-fucking-doo. But Elliot, the superhero that he is, followed me
home and stayed over one more night, just for me. SDkbjfgkbjgf, I can't
even handle how sweet and beautiful he is, fucking Hell.
Elliot
had to get up early, though. So, he woke me up to some cuddling and
after putting on some clothes we went downstairs to get ourselves a big cup of
coffee and take a smoke outside on my porch. I love doing that,
especially if the sun shines right on my face. Of course, my bby-boy had
to leave eventually and I followed him to the bus - which was late, to
both our frustration because he had a meeting that he really needed to
be on time to. It sucks to say goodbye, even to a person that you see
regularly and that only lives about half an hour away. But I can't help
it. Elliot makes me feel so good, he makes me happy beyond words and the
love I have for him is infinite. Oh my God, I sound so cheezy, I'll
stop now.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
P A R T Y
I am so stoked for tonight! Me and my boyfriend are going to a friend's place where she's going to have a party for her Birthday! The fun part of the whole party thing is that our friend had a Halloween party at her place last year, and that's where me and Elliot first met. It's going to be so nostalgic for us to go back there, ugh, I can't wait!
I'M GONNA DANCE DANCE DANCE WITH MY HANDS HANDS HANDS ABOVE MY HEAD HEAD HEAD
I'M GONNA DANCE DANCE DANCE WITH MY HANDS HANDS HANDS ABOVE MY HEAD HEAD HEAD
Friday, March 22, 2013
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Oodles of Doodles
Tattoo concept art for my boyfriend's character Charlie, who's still in development.
I picked up my pen yesterday and sketched a little and I gotta say that it felt good to draw something again, I haven't done that in a while. I've been thinking about posting pictures of my art here on my blog, so I hope that it'll be enjoyed.
I'm pretty happy about the idea I got for this. It's really too bad that I have no skills in how to draw tattoos in general though, and I can't draw anything related to space either, as you probably can tell. Other than the Lunar Eclipse, there's supposed to be stars and space stuffs inside the triangle but I seriously can't be bothered. Just, nope. I give up.
I picked up my pen yesterday and sketched a little and I gotta say that it felt good to draw something again, I haven't done that in a while. I've been thinking about posting pictures of my art here on my blog, so I hope that it'll be enjoyed.
I'm pretty happy about the idea I got for this. It's really too bad that I have no skills in how to draw tattoos in general though, and I can't draw anything related to space either, as you probably can tell. Other than the Lunar Eclipse, there's supposed to be stars and space stuffs inside the triangle but I seriously can't be bothered. Just, nope. I give up.
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Chillin' with my new bro
I got a new friend yesterday that's been hanging out at my place. Well,
more specifically, on my shoulder or in the hood of my hoodie or its
pockets. He's a rat and his name is Kira. He's super cute and
cuddle-friendly and really curious about his surroundings. He's been pitter-pattering along on
my desk, scenting everything, and I've discovered that he's got a spot
behind my computer screen where he likes to snooze. I kinda don't want
to return him to my friend, but I know I'll have to, seeing as I'm going
to my Dad's place anyway and can't bring him with me.
I think being close to animals is good for me, I feel happy and filled
with positive energy. It's too bad my Mom won't let me have any pets. I
believe it'd be good for me, to have something to come home to,
something to love and take care of. And I wouldn't feel alone.
When I get my own place I hope to get a pet as quickly as I possibly
can. I've got a few ones that I'd like to have, but I suppose it'd be
better if I started with something small in the beginning. Like two
ferrets. I've wanted to have a pair for a good couple of years now,
actually. But if I could pick whatever I wanted, I'd really like to have
a dog or two. Preferably a Pomeranian, Chow Chow or a Schipperke. Ugh,
now I really can't wait to move out!
Friday, March 15, 2013
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Changes can be good
I just recently got a haircut and even
though I sat there on the chair hyperventilating with anxiety as my friends
chopped strand after strand of hair off, I can say that I haven't
felt this good about my looks for some time now. The change is
radical, seeing as about 80% of my hair was cut off, but I feel so
good about it. I needed the change. If I had known that I'd look so
handsome and boy-ish I would've done it a long ass time ago. And yes,
me looking like a boy is a good thing. The best thing, in fact. It
makes me feel more comfortable in being gender-fluid and I'm
surprised over me feeling less need to put on the amount of makeup
that I used to hide behind before. My self-esteem is slowly, but steadily, raising
from the dirt and it feels awesome.
AFTER
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